


Figure Studies

by Alconis



Series: A Convocation of Warlocks [7]
Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, BDSM, Body Modification, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Impact Play, Multi, Pain as a love language, Polyamory, Porn with Feelings, Tattoos, Warlocks are all kinky and you know it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:26:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26872135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alconis/pseuds/Alconis
Summary: Vesper wants to sear the days she has left with Asher into her skin. She is surrounded by friends and lovers who circle in odd orbits, colliding with each other in unexpected patterns, each of them marked by sketches of memories recorded in ink on their skin.Her body is a blank canvas surrounded by a gallery of tattoos. It is the nature of things for her to want one too.
Relationships: Asher Mir/Original Character(s)
Series: A Convocation of Warlocks [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1137422
Comments: 3
Kudos: 10





	1. Figure A.

**Author's Note:**

> Kara Mahsa belongs to my forever favorite, [@yansurnummu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yansurnummu/pseuds/yansurnummu)

“Tell me about this one?”

Vesper trailed the pad of her index finger over the faded tattoo on Asher's hip. He gave her a vague noise of irritation and in return, she poked at constellations in silvery-blue ink. 

He huffed and twisted in their bed, rolling on to his stomach. She could see a crease forming between his eyebrows.

“It was a very long time ago.” Asher groused and looked away like a petulant child. “I don’t remember why I got that one. Not anymore.”

Vesper rested her hand between his shoulder blades. Her palm covered a different tattoo that swirled out like a galaxy in blue ink, and she marveled at the whorls of concentric circles. They danced and intertwined with fractals, which, in turn, faded into the rough, jagged edges of the Vex transformation. She caressed the raw and scarred skin for a moment before shifting to massage his back.

“Are there any that you do remember?” Her voice was quiet and for a moment after, the only sound was the whisper of skin on skin.

He closed his eyes, wincing as she pressed her palm into sore muscles and tender skin. Finally, he grumbled his answer into his forearms as he laid his head down and he let her soothe what aches and pains she could. “Time passes. It’s irrational to expect me to remember them all.”

The sound of soft footsteps and swishing fabric drew their attention before Vesper could press him further. They looked up in tandem to see Kara pause in the doorway in a long silk robe.

“It’s no use, pet. I've been asking about that one for a century and he won't tell me either.” He leaned against the doorframe in a study of elegant lines and willowy limbs. 

Asher glared at Kara, who stepped into the room and sat on the bed next to Asher’s hip. “This one though..." Long fingers traced over Asher’s calf, drawing Vesper's gaze to a figure of a crow sitting in a crescent moon. "He got _this one_ with me.”

Vesper ran a palm across Asher’s back, down over his buttocks and thighs to rest next to Kara’s hand. “I’ve always loved that one.” Her voice was soft as her thumb as it ran back and forth over the ink-black feathers.

“Traitor,” Asher grumbled, twisting to glare at Kara, though it was with little heat.

Kara leaned down and kissed him in return. “When will you learn not to keep secrets, Aşkim?”

“When my bodily autonomy, such as it is, is not up for debate,” Asher groused. 

There was a beat of silence as his words sat in the air like the threat of a storm. Then he turned to rest his forehead against the mattress again as Vesper continued to knead at the musculature of his back.

“I think they’re so beautiful.” Vesper’s words cut through the tension in the air as her hand stopped at the tattoo that covered his thigh. That one wrapped around his leg in white bands that seemed to hold together the corded muscle beneath. “I’ve always thought they looked like they belonged there. Like you sprung forth into this world with every tattoo already there.”

Asher made a huff of rough laughter and then coughed. And coughed again. There was a deep, phlegmy rumble in his chest as his lungs spasmed, and Vesper scrambled away to give Asher space. Kara pulled her close while Asher shifted into the vacancy, pushing up to sit and catch his breath.

His breath came in wheezing, gasping pants. Vesper found herself holding her own breath until, after a moment, he took a deep, shuddering inhale followed by a rough but solid exhale. Each deep, solid intake of air seemed to diffuse an unspoken tension around them.

After a moment, Asher rolled off the bed and stood. His movement cut through the stillness, though they were all silent as they adjusted against each other again. When they settled, Vesper lay with her back against Kara’s chest, silk whispering against her bare skin. Asher sat opposite where he had propped himself up on a wall of pillows, giving himself space to breathe.

Kara began to run his fingers down Vesper’s arms. She sighed and leaned into him, indulging in a sensation she so often craved. After a few minutes of soft strokes, Vesper stopped him with a gentle hand on his forearm. He looked down at her, arching his eyebrows in something that resembled curiosity.

She answered his unspoken question with a touch to the bare skin where his sleeves bunched at the elbows. A small eye was inked into his skin, long faded and blurring around the edges. He stilled, letting her trace the lines with the tip of her finger, and waited for her to speak.

“This one?” Vesper wasn’t sure what she was asking.

“Someone I love very much did that.” He rested his cheek against hers and laughed ar. “Sometimes, in _strange and tiny ways_ , you make me think of him.”

"It suits you." Vesper smiled. “Makes me think I…” She started to say in a voice that spoke of dreams, but then stopped. Her mouth snapped closed, and her cheeks flushed. “Nevermind. It’s stupid.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t assume what we’re going to think.” From across the bed, Asher looked at her, his eyes hard and his brows drawn together. Vesper's heart raced with embarrassment.

His eyes softened and he leaned forward to put his hand against her jaw. “Your intellect is never in question, my dear." He paused and ran his thumb over her cheekbone. "Now, tell us what you were thinking.”

Vesper felt Kara’s arms wrap around her abdomen, and she took a deep breath. “I think, I mean…” she stopped and frowned until she seemed to come to a decision. “No. I know I want one." She frowned and then added, "A tattoo, I mean.”

“Of course you do. Why _on earth_ would you think that was foolish?” Asher moved forward into the tangle of Kara and Vesper’s limbs. “Did you think we wouldn’t approve?”

Vesper shook her head, but then nodded, and she flushed in embarrassment. “I’m not sure how to say… It's not like that. It's not that you wouldn't approve." Her gut twisted and she pushed the words out of her mouth like marbles. "You have so many and they just look... right on you. Both of you. I don’t have any yet. What if I look terrible with one? Like it's out of place.”

When she paused for breath, Asher gave her a look of such disbelief that his eyebrows nearly went off his face. “I rescind my earlier statement about your intellect, because that, my dear, is the most _absurd_ thing I’ve ever heard you say." He sighed and leaned back against his pillows. "Frankly, my dear, I’m insulted.”

Vesper groaned and put her hands over her face. They muffled her words when she spoke. “I told you it’s stupid.”

A soft "hmm" against her cheek made her heart skip. "But you’ve thought about this quite a lot, haven’t you, pet?” Kara asked in her ear, tugging Vesper’s hands away and holding them. “Can you tell us about what you have been thinking?”

Vesper’s cheeks colored, and she turned to press her face against Kara’s shoulder. His skin was cool where her face felt hot. “I’m not ready, I think.”

They didn’t talk about what she was or wasn’t ready for, but Kara’s breath was gentle and warm. Instead of words, his lips found the tendon that stretched down her neck and kissed comfort into her skin. Vesper made a small noise and closed her eyes and let herself sink into the sensation.

She came back to herself when she felt the mattress shift as Asher moved to press his lips against Kara’s cheek. There was an awkward stretch as she felt Kara's shoulders shift when Asher pushed his robe off, leaving all three naked. Vesper opened her eyes to an abundance of skin, indistinguishable except for the shades of lilac and lavender and blue. A hand found an arm, and lips found the skin behind an ear. After a moment, Asher pushed forward, and they fell into a pile together.

Breathless, Asher pushed up and settled his weight over Kara's slim hips.

“Aşkim, tell us what you need?” Kara’s words were whispers in the space that wasn’t occupied by the three bodies. “You lead, and we’ll follow.”

She felt Asher’s grumble deep in her chest. He leaned down and kissed Kara with more force than she’d seen before. In the small vacancy between their mouths, there was a hitch of breath as Asher’s knee found the inside of Kara’s thigh.

Vesper pulled away to watch as they crashed together. She could see how Kara’s legs tangled between Asher’s, hooking a knee over his waist. The scientist responded by threading his left hand into his lover's hair as they kissed. As they wound together, Vesper watched them curl around each other in the hush and whisper of the night.

Asher’s mechanical right hand found Kara's delicate wrists. Metal fingers squeezed the slim bones in a soft grip that spoke of the potential of violence. Kara gasped and allowed Asher to tug his arms above his head and press them into the mattress. Vesper watched as Kara sunk into the bed beneath Asher's weight and bucked his hips to find friction. Instead, Asher leaned back and scolded Kara, smiling wickedly.

“Kara… my beautiful dark star." Asher’s voice was rough, reminding Vesper of snow crunching beneath her boots. His left hand ran over the side of Kara’s face, tracing delicate contours and sharp cheekbones. He ran the pad of his thumb over Kara’s lips, and the skin beneath his fingers was soft and smooth. “Is the question ‘what do I want?’, or ‘what will you give?’”

The Vex hand drew tighter around Kara’s wrists as Asher stretched down. Asher's lips kissed the canvas of Kara's smooth chest. The question hung in the air until Kara’s shoulders shifted. Asher let go, leaving a ring of bruises over delicate skin over bones.

“Aşkim, take what you want,” Kara said, breath short. “I trust you. Same as before.” 

Asher looked down at his lover with dark eyes, pupils blown wide and obscuring his blue irises. He stayed like that, gazing into Kara's eyes, for what seemed an eternity. "Same as before..." he murmured, and Kara smiled at him. Finally, he brushed his lips over Kara's and then rolled off the bed with heavy feet. He spared a glance at Vesper, and then moved across the room, confident in his nudity. Finding his desk, he began to rummage around through the drawers.

He grumbled until he found his prizes amongst the odd collection of useful and useless detritus that collected around him.

Kara remained still. His eyes followed Asher across the room but he did not move his body from where he had posed him. His limbs sprawled across the sheets in elegant lines and delicate angles. Vesper wanted to touch him. She moved toward him and pressed a kiss to the corner of his lips.

“Gülüm, will you watch us?” Kara’s voice was low and soft, and Vesper started when she felt his hand sink into the hair at the nape of her neck. She groaned when he twisted the fingers in her violet mess of soft hair and pulled her down for a bruising kiss. They broke apart, and Kara rested his chin on her head. “May we show you how we used to play before? I want to share this with you.”

She nodded against his neck. He kissed the top of her head, and she felt Asher's hand cover Kara's in a silent exchange she did not yet understand. Kara gave her a nudge and she leaned back, unsteady as the mattress dipped beneath her weight as she stood. Asher’s hand curled around her waist and pulled her close. She could feel his cock resting against her back like a firebrand as he leaned in close to whisper in her ear.

“My dear, I want you to watch me take our beautiful star down to his bones the way I used to.” Asher sounded different, younger, and hungrier than she’d heard before. He brought his other arm around her shoulders, and she felt hard leather against her skin. 

The sensation of the leather strap made Vesper shiver. It wasn't just from the warmth in her core but also from the icy heat in Asher’s voice. The void had swirled up around them like a fog, and he breathed it in like a canary in a coal mine.

“Yes.” The word was almost silent as she turned in his arms and kissed the artery in Asher’s neck that pulsed under her lips. “Let me see how you devour him.”

Vesper stood still as Asher stepped away from her and towards Kara. Asher held out the Vex hand for Kara to take and then pulled the other warlock against his chest. He twisted him in his arms so that Kara's back rested against Asher's chest. Like this, Vesper could see the arousal in both sets of eyes; one pair was silver and the other electric blue. She stood transfixed as Asher brought the strap against Kara's chest and murmured something in his ear. Kara gave a sharp nod, and it was as if a string pulled taut had snapped.

Asher pushed the other warlock against the mattress, rough in manner and intent. There was little tenderness as Asher slid the leather over Kara's skin, teasing him with the gentle sensation.

"Kara, dark star, be _good_ for me," was all he said before there was the crack of the leather and a moan. Vesper shivered as Kara trembled beneath Asher's hands. 

Each blow elicited sound from Kara’s mouth, some were cries of pleasure and some of the pain. Most sounded like both. Often, Asher would pause and lean over to kiss the welts on Kara's ass and thighs with soft lips on tender bruises.

“You are so beautiful, my dark star,” Asher said in a breathless whisper as if he had been running. He ran his left hand over a welt on Kara’s thigh. “So much so, I had forgotten just how lovely you look when I mark you.”

He paused, then set aside the leather strap to reach between Kara's legs. Kara’s body shook and he sobbed when Asher slid his hand over his cock. The strokes were idle, light, and teasing. Kara moaned and shifted, back arching further as he pressed his bruised ass into the air.

“Look at that, my dear.” Asher turned to look at Vesper as if he’d only just remembered she was there. “He’s such a beautiful creature. So beautiful, and so good for me." He stepped back into her space and murmured against her skin. "How did I get so lucky to have you both?"

Before Vesper could answer, he asked in a rough voice, "Will you let me mark you too?”

Vesper’s voice seemed to vanish, her mouth dry at the want of it. She could imagine the sting and hurt and the high of it... But this was for Asher and Kara. She kissed Asher, directing his hands to Kara’s hips.

“Asher, let me watch you fuck him first?” She ran her own palm over Kara’s hips, the smooth skin hot and tender beneath her fingers. Pressing against the marks in a way she wanted for herself, Vesper took her pleasure in the way Kara’s moan sounded round and wanton in his throat. She backed away, resisting temptation, letting Asher take what he needed.

He kissed her then and pressed the Vex hand against her throat. She sucked in a breath at the casual violence and closed her eyes as the metal digits raked down her skin. “Yes, I can let you do that." He paused, considering his thoughts, and then continued moving his fingers down her body.

"All things being equal, my dear, there must be rules. Please observe and take your pleasure in the observation. But…” and the hand stopped at the swell of her belly above her hips, and she gasped. “You may not come without permission. That’s for me.”

Her chin dipped as she nodded, and when he released her, she escaped to the chair in the corner of his bedroom. She watched, transfixed, and her hands moved with muscle memory to her cunt. Her fingers dipped in and circled her slick, swollen lips, keeping herself on the edge of pleasure but never letting go.

She watched as Asher poured a generous amount of lube over his fingers and pressed into Kara’s ass. His touch was not unkind but it was not gentle. The warlock gasped, pushing back against Asher’s fingers. Vesper could see the pleasure in Kara’s face as his body opened up for Asher. With small motions at first, Asher pistoned his fingers in a steady rhythm, and Kara squirmed and panted in time.

They continued like this for a few minutes, the sound luscious and lewd, until Asher could hold off no longer. His cock was high and flushed, angry and needy in its swollen arousal. He pulled out his fingers, and after a pause to coat his cock with more lube, he replaced them with the blunt head and pushed inside without any preamble.

“Oh, heavens above, fuck....” Kara cursed at the sensation, and his words were lost in breathless whispers as Asher began to fuck him. “Fuck, Asher, my darling, please…”

“Please, what?” He stopped and wrapped his left arm around Kara’s throat. “Slower? Be gentle? Is that what you want?”

“Harder, please. Fuck me harder,” was all Kara had to say before Asher’s hips snapped, sharp and swift as his blows earlier. “By the nine, Asher, hurt me, please.”

After that, the sounds from Asher’s mouth stopped sounding like words. Instead, they became animalistic growls, and they were the sounds of a living, breathing thing, not some inhuman machine. He fucked Kara until his hips stuttered, surging without any tempo but the unsteady beat of two bodies colliding.

Asher did not shout when he came; instead, it was little more than a gasp, and his body went rigid, startling Vesper. She could see Kara trembling beneath him, and she imagined his cock weeping and needy beneath him. She wanted desperately to put her mouth on him and watch him come undone.

But Asher had the same idea. He pulled out from Kara's ass and ran his hands over Kara’s marked skin. He pressed feather-light kisses to his bruises, and then he turned his lover onto his back and knelt down beneath him on the floor. Kara sat up and stared at Asher with a dozy, wanting look. It matched the one on Asher's face as he stared at Kara's flushed and twitching cock.

“I never said it enough before, but thank you, Kara.” Panting and high from his release, Asher laid his head against Kara’s thigh then kissed the inside of his groin. “My beautiful, shining dark star.” The change in his tone was subtle, but it was gentle and for a moment, humble.

Kara’s hand reached up, and his fingers tangled into the thick, short curls of Asher’s hair.

“Aşkim, you need only ask, and you can have anything you want.” His fingers scratched at Asher’s scalp, and Vesper could almost see the tension in the man’s body bleed out.

“It seems improbable to me that you should both want me.” As the words left his lips, Asher's mouth found the vein in Kara’s thigh and sucked at it. Kara thrust his hips forward into Asher's left hand as it wrapped around Kara’s length. He stroked Kara’s cock idly, and Kara writhed beneath him. “Is it too much to want you both? To ruin you both?” These words were ellipsis that slid over the air, and Vesper hoped that Asher was feeling generous.

She watched Asher kiss the length of Kara's cock before taking the whole thing in his mouth.

The moan that Kara made in response was obscene. Vesper's arousal surged as she watched her two lovers together. Her right hand was sliding in the folds of her vulva, making idle circles in time with her pulse. Her other hand was sliding over her own neck and breasts as Asher nipped and bit over Kara’s skin. She watched as Asher would move between his thigh and his cock, swallowing Kara’s length in one long motion, choking on it before sliding back up. It was messy and beautiful and Vesper was drunk on the wanting of it

On the bed, Kara looked as though he was dying of pleasure. Each time Asher's mouth moved, Kara arched forward and groaned and clutched at the sheets. Vesper watched him, ravenous and a bit jealous of them both.

Kara moaned again and looked in Vesper's direction. He caught her eye, and she recognized the look of want and desperation in that gaze. Looking closer, she could see how Kara’s hips stuttered; He was holding back though he trembled under Asher’s touch.

“Aşkim, oh… please, stars, oh…” Kara’s voice was hoarse, like crushed velvet on a well-loved toy. “Aşkim, let our sweet pet join us, I… oh… I want her mouth too.”

The slick sound of Asher’s mouth sliding off Kara’s dick seemed lewd, and he turned to Vesper with desire in his eyes and swollen lips.

“Yes, yes… let’s have our pretty rose put her mouth on you.” Asher kissed Kara’s thigh and stood, then roughly pulled Kara’s hips further off the bed. “You should let go, my dark star. If you won’t fuck my mouth, fuck hers instead.”

Kara looked at Asher with a sharp turn of his head, and the warlock chuckled. “Experience alone tells me when you’re holding back, and suspicion makes me think it's for my benefit. Unnecessary, but appreciated. This endeavor will be exponentially more effective if you let go.”

There was a beat of silence before Kara nodded, and Vesper shot forward. Her own pleasure forgotten, she had her lips wrapped around his length before he could exhale. Kara had fucked her mouth before, but this was different, desperate. This time, his long fingers held her head still, grip hard enough to hurt, as he thrust into her mouth. She could do nothing except gag and suck and moan as he used her. It was the kind of sexual violence that made heat twist in Vesper’s core, curling up through her chest and down her throat to intersect itself.

At some point, she registered Asher’s fingers between her legs, slipping through slick folds to find her clit. His fingertips teased it in lazy circles but not with the intensity that would bring her release. Vesper moaned around Kara’s cock, and he bucked up into her again.

“Gülüm, do that again,” Kara said. His voice was low and reckless and ragged, and Vesper moaned around his cock again. He bucked hard into her mouth, and Vesper felt herself sink down and let go. The pleasure that she felt at Asher’s touch coalesced into sobbing and panting. Kara was relentless, thrusting his cock between her lips, again and again, cutting off her cries in a percussive tattoo.

Her release had been close before, and Asher used this to his advantage, teasing her, bringing her to the brink, and then taking his hand away. When she'd stopped gasping, he would start again, fucking her with his fingers at the same tempo as Kara fucked her mouth.

Vesper could feel Kara's cock throbbing in time to his pulse. She wanted him to spill over her tongue so she could consume every salt-bitter-sweet drop of him. His hand had tightened in her hair, and she sobbed around him. Vesper had little warning; only a sharp inhale of breath, and a vicious tug of her hair told her he was climaxing. Kara pulled her off enough that the crown of his cock was soft on her tongue as he filled her mouth with cum.

She groaned as the taste hit her tongue, and she swallowed. She swallowed down her own release too; she held her scream between her lips and held herself on the edge until she’d consumed every drop. Vesper felt Asher’s arms pulling her away, and then his mouth was on hers. He chased the taste of Kara’s release for himself, and the kiss was vicious and needy. As they kissed, Asher's hand returned to her cunt and bucked up against the heel of his hand.

"Let go for me, my dear," was all he said before his hand brushed against her clit, and she came with a scream. Asher held her through it, kissing her as if he was claiming this too.

Afterward, Vesper curled around Kara's chest to hold him close even as Asher curled around his back. They touched each other, soft fingers sliding over even softer skin. When they could speak again, Asher asked Kara how he felt in a whisper that Vesper could hardly hear.

“Better than before, Aşkim,” Kara said with a relaxed sigh. “How do you feel?” His question rang through Vesper's head like church bells, as Asher curled his body closer to Kara and reached for her hands,

“Better…" He said, and huffed. "To say I am better than before is as obtuse as it is inane, but it is surprisingly apropos.”

Vesper giggled against Kara’s chest and let her eyes drift closed. A hand found the crown of her head and smoothed a palm over her hair. Another hand found her waist, and eventually, she could feel each of their arms find each other. As she drifted off into a sated slumber, she could not tell whose hands were whose; they held each other so that none felt alone.

————

The next morning, before she left them to go back to the Vanguard and the Tower, Kara pulled Vesper aside. He gave Vesper a name and comm channel. “For what we discussed last night. When you’re ready,” he said, his voice low and only for them. “Jaideep is very talented in many things, and I’d trust him with my life. That being said…” Kara paused, and Vesper could see him holding the words he wanted to say under his tongue. “Understand, he is a dear friend, but… he’s a bit unkempt.”

Startled, Vesper had laughed, trying to imagine what Kara would consider unkempt. After a moment, she smiled at him. “Thank you. For this," she said.

Kara cocked his head, and the gesture reminded Vesper of the crows she used to see in the EDZ. Her lips quirked in a smaller, sheepish grin, and she gestured back at Asher's small, comfortable room. "All this." She flapped her hand at all of it.

"Ah. It is quite literally my pleasure." He tugged Vesper's flailing hand from the air and held it to his chest. She calmed as she could feel his chest rise and fall with his breath. "I would not offer to stay if it wasn't also to my benefit."

“I can stay, you know. If you want me to stay,” she had said, wanting someone to give her permission to disobey her orders.

Kara turned and looked at Asher, who was digging in a pile of books. The scientist was tossing his bookshelves, looking for notes he’d tucked between the pages of one of his books. With each book searched, he was becoming more and more agitated. Kara made a dismissive wave at the mess. “We will be more than ok, darling. I have a whole set of books that I liberated from Osiris’ library to go through with him. We’ll keep ourselves busy.”

He punctuated his words with a wicked smile that almost didn’t reach his eyes. In the far corner of the room, Asher threw a book across the room and let out a disgruntled shout.

Vesper stood on tiptoe and pressed a soft kiss to Kara’s cheek. “You tell me if anything changes. I know you’ll take care of him.”

“Oh, yes, darling. Do not worry.” Kara raised a sharp eyebrow and grinned. “I’ve missed having him.”

The punctuation was audible, and Vesper laughed as she leaned into his chest.

She stayed there longer than necessary if only to listen to the thrum of blood through Kara’s veins, and she did not notice Asher until she felt a third hand on her back. Lips followed on her neck, and Asher wrapped the Vex hand around her waist. His chest felt hot, and he was breathing a little heavy as he pressed his forehead against her shoulder.

“Be careful. I’m not opposed to finding another assistant, but you cannot be replaced, my dear.” Asher's voice was soft and rough and wonderful in her ears.

“Hush,” Vesper said, her face still pressed into the soft fabric of Kara's robes. The warlock stood still as she fought back tears she had been holding in for weeks. She pressed her nose against Kara one last time and then pulled back, untangling herself from her two lovers. “I’m leaving. Now. Before I change my mind and Ikora has my head for blowing her off. Again.”

She turned and walked out the door without looking back. She didn't want them to see the way her mouth twisted when she finally let herself cry.


	2. Figure B.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, it is only through the eyes of another that you see yourself as you truly are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Both James and Kara belong to [Yansurnummu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yansurnummu/pseuds/yansurnummu). Thank you so much for _everything_ , much less letting me borrow your bbs. 💖
> 
> It is helpful to have read [Nameless/Midnight](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16459460) for context, but it's not necessary. In brief, James and Vesper met prior to the events of Destiny 2's Red War campaign but didn't actually learn each other's full names. CW: It's super smutty and nsfw.

Several weeks later, Vesper found herself in the wilds of the EDZ. Kara's coordinates had sent her through vast mountain ranges into deep, wild forests, far from civilization. 

She set her ship down a few hundred meters away from a wrecked-looking Ketch on the edge of a lake and stepped out. While she doubted any Eliksni still inhabited it, she remained wary. Driven by her restlessness, she pinged the comm frequency she had committed to memory. 

It was a few minutes before she registered any movement, her attention focused on the sound of the forest. Birdsong and the whisper of wind through the trees held her in place, and when the ship's door opened with a loud _thunk_ , she jumped. 

She whirled around to look behind her, as a lanky, dark figure with a mess of curls stepped out. Vesper’s breath caught, startled by the familiar stranger.

“ _Ves? You’re_ Kara’s friend?” The figure in the doorway asked as if he might be seeing things. She could see a wry smile cross his features. “Of course you are. I don't know what I expected from her.”

“Ha! I recognize your face." Vesper's smile was wide, but she didn’t move. “ Hullo, _Just James._ You look good…” She paused, looking at him with a comically-critical eye. “Kara called you unkempt, though I think she might be a bit unfair. I’ll revise that to unruly.”

James’s laugh was soft and sad, and Vesper shuffled in place, suddenly nervous. He gestured to the ship and turned, ignoring the blush that colored her cheeks with natural grace. 

“Come on in. Maybe I can help you can revise that thought a little further.” He delivered his words with a cheeky waggle of his eyebrows, which seemed to release her from some spell. Jogging forward with her jacket tagging her heels, she found her momentum as she followed him.

The inside of James’s ship was like what she imagined the inside of a hurricane might look like. Chaos reigned, but when she looked close enough, there seemed to be the barest hint of order. Still... she still didn't see anything like what she imagined a tattoo artist's studio to look like.

“Um… where exactly were we going to do this?” She winced at her own uncertainty, but James just raised an eyebrow. He grinned and then gestured to his bed. The sheets were messy and rumpled from what Vesper imagined was a restless night. 

"Like many things, I’ve found it most comfortable between the sheets.”

Vesper blushed and then laughed, the sound echoing off the metal walls of the ship. “Oh fucking hell, you’re the worst.”

The grin on James’s face became wider but didn’t quite reach his eyes. “That’s what everyone says.” With a turn, he took long strides deeper inside, leaving Vesper to follow. 

“Actually, not everyone,” Vesper said, sprinting to catch up to the hunter. “Today, you're in luck... I’m pretty sure Kara would argue on your behalf. She says you're the best at this, and she’s never given me a reason to think otherwise.”

James hummed to himself, then paused, stopping in front of a curtain of beads that replaced a missing hydraulic door. Pushing them away, he walked past, and Vesper heard him rummaging around inside. She swallowed a small kernel of doubt. 

“James? Did Kara tell you why I wanted to do this?”

“No?” The hunter sounded as if he had something in his mouth, muffling his words. _“Naa, ‘ee jus ‘olme ooo eshpec summon.”_

“Um. Say again?” Vesper peeked her head through the curtain, and she saw James crouched above a random assortment of tool boxes and sundry machines. “I didn’t understand a word you said.” Sheepish, he pulled a stack of paper from between his lips. 

“Sorry. All I said was ‘he just told me to expect someone.’” He set down the stack of paper and moved on to the next pile. “But I can guess why. I been doin’ a lot of memorial tattoos lately.”

“Ah." Vesper spun in place slowly, taking the whole room in. It felt as though it was half-Cathedral of Junk, half-flotsam and jetsam of a genius. “In a way, you’re not wrong. It’s for my… it’s for Asher." After a beat, she clarified. "Asher Mir.”

The dark curls popped up, startled. “That so?” He stood, long, elegant legs unfolding, and when he stood at full height, Vesper was reminded of how tall he was. “That Kara’s Asher? He’s still alive?”

“Yes.” Vesper was proud of how her voice didn’t break.

“Kara didn’t say nothin' bout it.” There was a bit of an accusatory tone in James’s voice, but it wasn’t cruel. “Not to sound unkind or nothin’, but Kara’s always been too good for that prat. Asher’s a right cunt. Can’t imagine how _you_ get on wit ‘im.”

“Asher and I are, um.” She blushed and laughed again, but the sound was hollow in her ears. This time, the heat in her cheeks was painful in the way that came from swallowing her tears. “I care for him. Very much. Him… and Kara.”

James looked at her for a long time, his big, brown eyes quizzical and serious, and then nodded. “Alright." With that word, the kernel of doubt dissolved. "Show me what you had in mind?”

Vesper brought out Kilo and had her ghost pull up the design. The geometric pattern floated in the air in a maze of lines and circles. “I wanted something to… remember him by. Just in case.”

Neither needed to be reminded what “just in case” meant.

“It’s beautiful." James smiled as he brought out Minali. The two ghosts scanned each other and, after a bit of chatter and a set of dual beeps, Minali projected the image instead. “Simple, but elegant. It won’t take very long.”

“Oh.” Vesper turned to the side and was silent. She rotated around again, taking in the cluttered, warm interior, and she sighed when she found her way back to his face. “No?”

James put his hand on the back of his head and gave her an apologetic smile. “It’s lines, nothin' more. It won’t take more than twenty minutes. Thirty, tops.” He wandered off and returned with his kit, and he gestured for her to lie on the bed. When she hesitated, he gave her an encouraging pat. “I know it don’t look like much. My kit ain't nothin’ fancy, but it works real well.”

She raised an eyebrow as she looked at the tangle of sheets that he’d pushed off to the side of the bed. “I'm. Sorry, but…" Vesper paused, and let out her words in a single, long breath. "What if I wanted it to? Take more time, I mean.” Startled, James looked up, blushing, and she rolled her eyes. “Don’t misunderstand, I just… I want to _remember_ it. You know what I mean?”

James nodded, eyes sad. “I do. Gimme one second.” He turned and started rummaging in a different pile. This one looked like a random mess of personal items, and he looked pleased when he pulled out a worn box. He shook it, and it rattled a bit. “We can do it the old fashioned way, I guess. Needle and a touch ‘a ink. That’ll take a good while.”

“You know, I don’t have anywhere else to be?" She made a sad little half-grin and pulled off her jacket and her undershirt without shame. It left her small breasts bare as she laid down on her stomach. “Now that you're here, we can catch up. It was such a shame... you and I started a lovely conversation a while back, then two days later, the whole world fell apart.”

She felt a warm hand on her back and a chill from the stencil sticking to her skin. “That’s a very delicate way of putting it,” he said, thumb running over the slick paper, pressing it against her spine. As he peeled it away, the sensation gave her goosebumps. "Seem to remember things went a bit pear-shaped for me."

Vesper made a small noise in something like agreement. A soft silence fell as James began to work, and she closed her eyes and focused on her breath. When she felt the first pinch of the needle, it made her hiss, exhaling slowly against the pain.

At the sound of her breath, James pressed his palm on her back, and she felt a pulse of void run through her body. It brought with it a familiar sensation of icy hot stardust, numbing her skin.

“Did you teach Kara that, or did he teach you?” Vesper’s question was soft, and James answered with a small hum.

“I think he showed me, but it was, fuck, I dunno,” James paused in his work to gaze at the ceiling. “Hundred and twenty years ago? Give or take?” His hands resumed their swift motions, and Vesper hoped he’d continue to talk, as she was starting to feel as though she was floating away.

“You’ve known each other a long time,” Vesper said, a little lost in thought. “I forget, sometimes, how old other people are, you know? How many years have passed for you.” She turned so her cheek rested against cool sheets and closed her eyes so she could concentrate on feeling the pinch of the needle. "Compared to you, 'm a baby."

“After a while, I forget too.” James’s voice was muffled as he focused on the repetitive motion, and they fell into silence.

Vesper could hear her heartbeat as he worked, and she measured her breath in its tempo. James worked fast, but it still felt like an eternity between each prick of the needle. When he hit the knobs of her spine, she couldn't help but cry out.

“You need a break?” It was a second before Vesper registered that James had stopped. “I could use a break. Grab a smoke, get some water. Hands are getting a little tired.” She felt his warm palm on her lower back, and then it disappeared.

She turned her head to see James stand up, and he pulled a towel from a messy pile. He wiped his hands and then handed it to Vesper. “Only thing I ask is don’t put your shirt back on.”

A coy smile played over Vesper’s face, and she laughed into the sheets. “When have I heard that before?” 

She sat up, breasts pert and bare, and the tender flesh of her back burned as she moved. Beyond, silhouetted in the doorway, she could see James lighting his cigarette. Smoke curled around his face and over his head. She shifted out of the bed but left the towel on the pillow. The cool air from the open door of the ketch peaked her nipples, and she shivered, despite her boldness. Her hands were steady as she came to stand behind him and touched his shoulder.

“Can I?” and she gestured to the carefully rolled cigarette between his fingers.

He handed it to her, watching her face as she inhaled, lips wrapped around the filter. The smoke filled her lungs, and she bit back a cough. Within seconds, her balance went a bit woozy as the nicotine hit her system. She tried to remember when she’d last smoked as she handed the cigarette back to James and idly patted him on the back. As before, familiarity came easily; she only registered his slight flinch when his shoulder relaxed. 

“Ready to finish this up?” he asked as he took another drag and flicked the filter away into the lake. “I promise this torture shouldn’t take too much longer.”

"Self-inflicted." She clarified as she took her place on her stomach in his bed. "I'm a bit of a masochist, you see..." 

"'Coulda told you that," he said, as James’s warm hands slid over her skin where he had yet to ink. 

With practiced ease, he resumed his work, finding a rhythm. Vesper found herself drifting away again, thinking of Asher’s recent experiment. Her mind wandered as she thought of ways to help him find a different way of extracting data from the spent Vex milk. She’d started spinning equations in her head when she registered that James had asked her a question.

“Say again?” She tilted her head, and he looked back at her as if he was trying to puzzle something out.

“I was… contemplatin’ how a pretty girl like you would end up with Asher Mir.” He smiled at her once more, and this time his eyes were filled with mirth. “Gotta admit I asked Kara the same question a couple ‘undred years ago.”

She turned to the side, hiding her smile from him. “I don’t entirely know. He just… fits. Never met anyone quite like him. He’s…” Vesper stopped, holding her words back. “James? What do you think of him?”

“Right, I’ll be honest,” James said, never pausing in his work. “Asher was always a little mean for my tastes. Never got on with him like Kara did. But that was a century ago... never know, he coulda changed.”

“He hasn't." 

James barked out a laugh, and then mumbled a quick apology. 

"It’s alright. I'm well aware how he's a _complex person_ ,” Vesper answered in return, with a small laugh. “I love him, but he’s far from perfect.”

“Kara always fancied him too.” James’ voice was quiet, and Vesper’s eyes closed as she listened to the nearly forgotten cadence of her familiar stranger. “Then again, Kara has always loved clever, unique people.”

Vesper made a sound of agreement and rested her forehead against the pillow. It smelled familiar in the way that a campfire always reminded her of the first freeze of fall. “Kara herself is a unique and clever creature.”

James laughed. “Probably why she took up with you.”

Vesper smiled sadly against the cool fabric, her words muffled. “I don’t know… It’s been a rough couple of years… for me and my fireteam. At least, what’s left of it.”

James hummed a vague noise of acknowledgment but didn’t say anything. Vesper could feel his thigh tensing up where he sat next to her hip, and she frowned. “James, were you ok? After, I mean?” 

Neither needed to say what “after” meant.

“No.” He stayed silent for a moment as he continued his work. Then, finally, “I really wasn’t. But I’m doing a little better now. I found some of the folks I thought I'd lost, made a few new friends.”

“That’s good,” Vesper said in return, her voice soft and dazed, reveling in the adrenaline high from the pain. “You know… Asher and Kara are the best things that could have happened to me. I think I would have been lost if it hadn’t been for them.”

“Mmm,” was all he said, and then paused. He took a short breath, as if remembering something, and then exhaled. “Yeah, I know what you mean.”

A comfortable silence spread over them, the only sound the shift of his hands over her skin as he worked with the needle.

When he finished, he held a mirror over her back and gave her a second mirror to use so she could see behind her. Together, she could see how the lines and circles traced over her spine in sweeping arcs. Shapes danced around each other, even though the lines were thin and simple. It looked as though they would start moving at any moment.

She sat up, and the tears she’d been holding in for weeks… months… began to fall.

Long, lean arms wrapped around her, and strong, rough, wiry hands pulled her forward and held her tight. “Don’t do no good to hold it in, luv.” James’s words sounded familiar in so many ways, she felt like she’d become separated from her body. Vesper was drifting through time and seeing every time she’d been alive, and she could see how lucky she truly was.

She cried for what could have been an hour or simply minutes, and James stood there and held her through it. When she left him, with her armor back on and hiding her newly marked secret, she thanked him. He nodded, and she hoped he understood that her words were not simply gratitude for the tattoo.


	3. Quad Est Demonstratum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Q.E.D._ , short for _Quad Est Demonstratum_ , is often found at the end of a mathematical or philosophical proof, and literally means "thus it has been demonstrated." It is important to show your work - to speak the words, to show the figures, and to make your case. 
> 
> For Vesper, that work is written on her skin, a permanently-drawn figure to represent an intangible feeling. It is her proof to show who she is, and what is important to her. And to remember those she loves. 
> 
> The figures have been drawn, the argument is made, and the proof is complete. All that is left is to say, "it is finished."

While Vesper traveled back to Io, the secret of the tattoo still burned on her skin. She lay in her bunk on her ship and let the whole thing run through her mind.

For her, the surprise almost meant more than the inked figure on her spine, layered with meaning itself. Nine figures, representing the Sol system that she'd fought for. Three groups of intertwined shapes, representing fireteams, both lost and loved. Small circles between and along the lines connecting them, for her little light. And a small tesselating figure of triangles at the bottom to represent the Pyramidion... and her complicated relationship with Asher.

The tattoo was her own personal totem, her narrative, and she held it dear. She knew from her friends and lovers, who all were older by decades... centuries even... that in ten, or fifty, or a hundred years, she would not be the same person as she was now. Nor should she be, as, with every breath, she became something new.

She stepped onto the soft, yellow grass of Io, and beneath her armor, her skin raised up in goosebumps. Asher’s home was quiet when she made her way inside, and the dark and stillness made her anxious. She held her palm out and gave Kilo a nudge, waiting for the little ghost to appear.

“You know, it’s not as if we’re trespassing,” Kilo said, appearing with a shimmer, and his voice a little weary. “I know I've said you're reckless, but this is overcompensating. I’m not going to scan every Traveler-forsaken hovel you think is ‘troublesome’.”

“Shhh…” and Vesper pulled her ghost to her chest, hoping the dread she felt was in her head. “Kilo, can you…" She stopped, her heart thumping in her ears. "Is Asher here? Can you tell?”

The ghost’s plates twitched against her armor, struggling, and she released him. He spun in place, his petulance replaced with a comforting soft blink of his plates at Vesper. “Stop worrying. I don’t see anything out of the ordinary…" His tone was calm, placating. "He's not here, but by the latent heat readings, he’s only been gone for twenty minutes or so.”

She sucked in a breath, trying to let go of the dread in her stomach. She set her bag down on the floor before throwing herself into the oversized chair in his main room. She knew why she was afraid, and why it made her feel ashamed.

She glanced at Asher's worktable. Her eyes roamed over the familiar clutter to see if his sidearm was still there. The sight of it, still sitting where he’d left it, loosened the knot in her stomach. Instead, his bag of sonic amplifiers was missing.

She frowned, frustrated by her own lack of trust. Guilt rose in her mouth like the sickly sour taste of curdled milk. This hadn't gone as she'd expected, she thought, and she curled in on herself and waited.

After a time, there was a shuffle in the doorway and the sound of a generator. Asher appeared as a silhouette first and then, as the lights flickered on, she could see his face. He glanced up to see her in his chair and there was no surprise or shock. He merely grumbled and smiled then put his bag down in its place and came towards her to meet her.

“You missed a phenomenal display of pyrotechnics, my dear," he said, as he sat down on the arm of the chair. Reaching out, he caressed her cheek with his thumb. “Those red-armored rhinos attempted to send an excavation drill down… _again_. Somehow, none of your compatriots were near. The closest signal I could get was from a gaggle of common rabble in the Lost Oasis.” He sighed, frustrated with the other guardians.

“Since my disappointment is not an effective method of disruption, I made do without you." He chuckled, pleased with his own ingenuity. "I recently discovered a property of the organogel in Cabal machinery that causes it to expand when exposed to certain frequencies. I rigged my sonic amplifiers to, well, _amplify_ the non-auditory sonic waves produced by that awful, grossly-simplistic, so-called machinery. ”

"You're saying you _shook_ them to death?" Vesper asked.

“My theory was sound, of course." Asher looked off toward the door and his expression turned wicked. "Everything containing the organogel exploded.”

Vesper grinned, and it was both for joy at his story and pure relief at his safety. She let her fingers walk over his knee toward his hip as she looked up at him through her long lashes. “And I suppose that includes the sludge in their armor?”

Her knowing expression as she said this made him cackle.

“Hah… Indeed! I will enjoy the memory of those overripe, swollen Cabal split open like rotten fruit.” He stood again and brushed invisible ichor off his robe. “Once more, science is the mightier weapon.”

He offered his left hand to her to stand. When she looked down at it, she sucked in a breath. There, in the fleshy dip between his index finger and thumb, was a tessellation of triangles that matched the one at the base of her spine.

Her eyes flashed up to his, and he gave her a look she couldn't quite decipher. He took her hand in his and cut her off before she could say anything.

“To answer your inevitable question, it was simple, careful observation, my dear. As I've told you before," he said, stroking her thumb with his own. "You have many skills, but stealth is not one of them.”

When she made a noise of protest, his lips formed something like a half-smile.

“All I will say is that observation is effortless for those practiced in its arts.” His voice was gruff as he pulled her out of the chair and to his chest. “I don’t know whether I'm insulted or flattered that you thought you could hoodwink me, _let alone Kara_.”

As she buried her face in his robes, she could almost hear the lecture he was holding back. He wrapped his arms around her and trailed a cold metal finger over her spine. The motion drew a sharp gasp from her lips as it pressed the fabric into tender flesh.

“And as much as I am loathe to admit it," he said, his tone gruff but kind, "Her void-touched, disheveled hunter remains ever talented and accommodating.”

_“_ I wanted to surprise you,” she said in the stillness of the air around them. When her voice broke on the last word, his arms tightened and she felt his lips on her head.

_“_ My dear, I am not a fool.” Asher’s voice was thick, burying her under layers of sand and keeping her grounded. She struggled for a moment until he shushed her and ran his hand up and down her spine. “I am not a man confounded easily, but Vesper," and he paused and let her pull back to look in her eyes. "You _never_ cease to surprise me."

Vesper inhaled and swallowed, finding herself surprised by the tears in her eyes, but he continued.

"From the first day I met you, you’ve offered me an illusion of strength and control, and I take it each time like a thief. And each time, I’m flabbergasted that you do not protest.”

She leaned into his chest, letting her hands slide up his back and curl around his shoulders in a possessive embrace.

“I think you know me better than I know myself.” Her words were quiet and muffled against the thick fabric. She wasn’t sure if he’d heard her until he made a small hum, and then they were silent as they stood alone together.

After a moment, he pushed her to arm’s length and twisted her around so he could face her back.

“Well, my dear, for all that fuss, let’s see what you did.” His left hand fumbled at the clasp at her neck and, once it had yielded, he pulled her robes apart like they were made of gossamer instead of heavy armor. He slipped her sleeves off her shoulders and the robe fell to the floor with a heavy thump. This left her in her underthings, and where he was not touching her goosebumps appeared on her skin. His cool metal fingers slipped under the strap of her undershirt, and he shifted it off her shoulder and down her arm to expose her shoulder blades.

Like a curtain rising in reverse, the tattoo was revealed.

Asher stood back and ran the tip of his index finger over it. He followed the large, thin, concentric circles that swooped over the planes of her back. He traced every line and dot with a reverence she’d rarely felt. His fingers traveled over skin and muscle, pushing aside soft fabric to expose her to him.

Asher’s lips found the vein in her neck that was thrumming in time with her heart and punctuated his motions with small kisses. She shivered as he moved, his nose tickling the fine, baby-soft hairs that fell from her braids at the nape. It made her moan, and he nipped at her throat until the room filled with the sound of her gasps.

“I was trying to find a way to capture what it feels like, this… life beyond.” Vesper’s words were quiet, only a fraction louder than the shift of the fabric, not wanting to break this spell. “This… incredible, unimaginable afterlife we didn’t ask for. The huge responsibility we hold. How we're just a small, infinitesimal piece of what this universe offers.”

She sucked in a breath as his hand traveled around her waist and grazed the v of her hip bones before sliding up over her belly.

“Hmph. The feeling you describe so eloquently is one with which I am familiar.” Asher used his left hand to push at the delicate fabric that had bunched at her hips. Her undershirt fell to the floor, leaving her breasts bare. He brushed a finger over a nipple, and she gasped, pressing closer.

When he continued, his voice was low and excitement ran through it like veins in marble. “Each time I chose to mark myself, it was to remind myself why I was alive. They are reminders of the unimaginable cruelty of my existence as a guardian and the unending possibility of discovery I had as a warlock.”

He paused, and Vesper remained silent, waiting for him to continue. When he did, he turned his focus on her.

“You are astonishing, my dear.” She blushed, her cheeks and chest turning a rosy violet.

“Thank you,” was all she said, and she let the words hang in the air, allowing her gratitude to fill the air like smoke.

Asher stepped back and began fumbling with his own collar and buckles. She watched as he undressed, a fond smile on her face as the familiar lines of ink and the curves and planes of his chest were exposed. Her hands itched to touch him, and he was half undressed before she couldn’t stand it any longer.

Vesper pushed forward on tiptoe and cupped his face in her hands, kissing him deeply. He stilled, shocked, and then it became a messy tangle of arms and lips and hands and tongue. She felt him struggle against gravity, almost losing his footing, and she planted her feet and pulled.

She crushed him to her chest, arms holding him tight and pressing her breasts flat against him. When they were on solid ground again, he kissed her again, and she sighed in pleasure. The feeling of his skin on hers was divine, and she wanted to feel as much of his skin against hers as possible. His hands, both his own and the Vex armature, wrapped around her back and cradled her against him.

After a moment, Asher broke the kiss. With his lips parted and their breath mingling, and he slid his left hand up over her spine and into her hair, sending a shiver down her skin. He kept his gaze on her own as his fingers deconstructed her braids, tugging at them until they fell into loose, wild curls.

Vesper giggled at the feeling of her hair tickling her shoulders. Like her, it was wild and unruly, unable to decide whether it wanted to go up or down. He pushed his fingers in the silky strands with a gentle slide, making her tremble and the curls bounce and shake against her shoulders.

“Asher, what are you doing?” She looked at him with a fond smile, and he returned it.

“Reviewing my data. I am making a secondary examination with all unnecessary impediments removed.” Vesper shivered again as his left hand cradled the back of her head. The thick, purple strands slipped through his fingers. He swept his palms down her body, removing her panties and leaving her completely exposed.

"Was that everything?" He asked when he stood up. "I want to be thorough."

Her answer was to put her hands on the buckle of his trousers and undress him, leaving him as naked as she was. When she finished, she stepped back and observed him instead. She did not stare but looked at him with reverence, and he looked at her fondly in return.

Looking at him, she could feel her love in everything around her. It was in the cold air, the sting of her newly-healing tattoo, the lock of white hair curling over his forehead, and the hint of day-old stubble on his cheek. She didn't realize how long she had looked until he cleared his throat, and she looked up to see him blushing.

“You look as though you’ve discovered why ghost shells are dodeca-hexagonal.” He grumbled at her as she moved forward and put the palm of her hand on his cheek.

“I love you,” was all she said before he kissed her. After that, there was only the sound of their lips and breath and skin on skin.

Asher lifted her slim body up, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. This brought his hard cock deliciously close to her entrance and she rolled her hips to feel him against her. In response, he kept kissing her even as he pressed her against the wall. She let out a cry into his mouth.

“Careful, it’s tender,” she said, and Asher nodded, dipping his head to press his lips against her neck.

“My dear, I am intimately familiar with that sensation,” he said. His words felt like small puffs of laughter against her throat. “I will do my best to be gentle.”

Vesper laughed in response and tangled her fingers in his thick, white locks. They tickled her chin as she pressed her lips to the crown of his head. “You? Gentle? How novel,” she said, and he bit at where her neck and shoulder joined, making her gasp. When he'd sucked a mark into her skin, he spoke with his lips still against her throat.

“If you’d prefer, I can get the crop and give you a few more marks to take your mind off the pain.” Asher’s voice was wry and held humor, and Vesper knew the threat was hollow. She giggled into his hair.

“No, thank you, not today,” she answered. She closed her eyes in pleasure as he pressed soft kisses against her skin. She felt his arms tighten around her, and then they were moving, his steps swift. When she opened her eyes again, they were in the golden glow of his bedroom.

Asher shifted so he could set her down on the bed and then pushed back the covers and slid between the sheets. He pulled her on top of him as he settled, her knees on either side of his hips. She could feel his abdominals strain as he leaned up to press his lips to hers once more, and she met him halfway. As their kiss grew deeper, Vesper shifted again, and then suddenly, he was filling her.

Surprised, the noise she made was quiet, and once more, she felt Asher strain to meet her lips with his own. His left hand slipped over her skin and found her waist, and the right pressed metal fingers at the small of her back. A cold but gentle touch guided her forward, and she began to rock her hips.

Vesper’s pace was slow, languid, and almost lazy. She took her time, gasping when the pressure of his cock filling her completely became too much. She would rock forward, and feel his length slip between her lips, and then back, impaling herself again. Asher’s hands steadied her, and his left shifted from her hip to lay flat on her belly. The sensation of his warm, wide palm moving slowly over her skin made her eyes close and her head tilt backward, making her arch against him.

“You look so beautiful like this, my dear.” Asher’s voice was graveled and rough. She opened her eyes and saw he was shaking a bit from the effort to remain still. "I should have you like this more often."

She let out a giggle, then gasped as he snapped his hips. Vesper fell forward, her curls falling in both their faces before he shifted it out of the way to kiss her once more.

“How exactly are you having me, then?” She asked against his lips, breathless with mirth and exertion. She whined as he ran the fingers of his right hand up her spine, and the cool feeling of the metal against the tender, marked skin made her shiver. Vesper paused to lay flat against Asher’s chest for a moment to catch her breath. As she moved, his cock slipped from her and pressed against her entrance, hot and hard and twitching in need.

“Like you have won a victory over me," was all Asher said, and then he kissed her, his lips gentle. She felt his metal fingers lift from her back and then a soft touch at her temple, brushing her hair from her face once more. “And I am your spoils.”

Vesper made a “tch” noise, and then she pressed her small palm against his cheek. She ran her thumb over his cheekbone and they were both silent as her index finger traced the white “V” that covered his face, her touch delicate. His eyes closed and his lashes fluttered against his cheek, the white stark against his blue skin.

“You are no one’s reward, Asher Mir.” Vesper said, her voice almost inaudible, “Nor are you a punishment or a consolation prize.” She leaned back, letting his hardness settle between her legs. Taking his hand, she held it to her breast. “You are you, and you are perfect, ___just as you are_.”__

“Absolute frivolous poppycock,” he said, and his lips turned up in a small smile. “And yet, my dear, I can only ask that you remain a vexing thorn of sentiment that keeps my cold, callous heart beating.”

“Say again?” Vesper said, her voice thick.

Asher leaned forward, pulling her close as he twisted, and she found herself on her back and her lover above her. She hissed and squeezed her eyes closed at the sudden burn of pressure on her back. When she opened them, Asher was looking at her with the same confused look she remembered from when they first met.

“Vesper, I suppose what I’m trying to say…" He paused, huffing in annoyance. His brows furrowed, and he pursed his lips.

Vesper waited, and when he finally spoke, the words fell out in a rush.

"Oh for… __I love you,__ you absurd creature.”

He frowned at her as she blinked, her mouth open in a perfect “o” of surprise. He rested on the Vex arm as his left hand brushed her cheek, not pointing out her tears. “I often jest about your intelligence, but it would be an insult to me if your vast well of information did not include that base fact."

“I… suppose I’m not as smart as you give me credit.” Vesper’s voice was soft, and it was thick with everything she’d never said. “But now I know.”

She hoped he could hear how she loved everything about him... the feeling of him in her arms... the warmth of his cock on her lips and tongue... the curl of his hair beneath her fingers... the sound of his annoyance over the comm... the smell of ink and metal and copper that filled her nose as she pressed her face into his shoulder...

There was a pause, and then Asher pushed forward, interrupting her reverie by sliding inside her.

Overwhelmed by him, Vesper could only hold on for dear life. Asher’s motion was gentle, but his strokes were long and steady, hitting every sweet spot and making her see stars. Gentle pressure was building behind her eyes and her chest and in her abdomen, warming her as she clung to his cock.

She realized she had squeezed her eyes closed when she felt Asher’s lips against her own, and his breath was coming in erratic pants. When she opened her eyes, his bright blue irises were close to hers, and his breath was hot against her cheek.

He paused, gasping for breath, and then he reached between them. He pressed his warm fingers against her mound, sliding down to circle her clit. It only took a moment for the pressure to build and explode, and she let out a shout as her hips thrust forward. She bucked under his touch, wrapping her legs around his hips as she climaxed.

Her inner walls clenched as he continued to fuck her through her orgasm, but he did not stop, not even when she was reduced to short, gasping whimpers. She could feel his thighs shake from the effort and his breath was coming in short, uneven gasps. Vesper’s whines became more intense with each thrust, but he was relentless. In her dazed, blissful haze, she could not remember when, or even if he’d ever fucked her like this before.

She closed her eyes again as his thrusts became shorter and faster, and a second climax grew in her core. She tried to hold back with her breath, but each exhale overwhelmed the inhale, and she broke. Vesper screamed, letting go once more.

Asher’s own climax was almost in tandem with her second. His shout was a short, sharp thing in comparison to the cries she made into his shoulder. His thrusts were unsteady as he emptied himself inside her, and eventually, he came to a stop. He pressed a hand to the back of Vesper's head and drew her against his chest. She shook in his arms, overloaded by touch and sound and sight. Her heartbeat hammered in her ears, making her almost dizzy. She could hear him making small “shhh” noises in her ear, his voice rough and unusually gentle.

As she quieted, Asher shifted until she lay against his chest. As her own breathing calmed, she could hear the wheeze of his lungs when she pressed her ear near his sternum. His hand ran up and down her spine in slow, idle strokes, tracing the raised, inflamed lines of the tattoo. It drew her back into the moment, making her hiss and gasp against him. He whispered praise into her ears, words of adoration falling easier from his lips. Every few minutes or so, Vesper looked at him as if he’d discovered spinmetal, and he would return her gaze with a smile of his own.

After a time, she dozed. In her sleepy haze, she felt him get up and leave the bed, tucking her in and kissing her cheek. She stirred, and he returned her sleepy smile.

“I am aware that I am not a man of sentiment often but, my dear, you must know...” he said, his voice breaking as he ran his hand up and down her skin. He closed his eyes and kissed her again, this time taking more time to open her mouth and lick inside. Greedy, he deepened the kiss until Vesper's breathing was heavy. When they parted, he whispered his words against her lips.

“Mathematically, it can be demonstrated... With the ever-constant changing of time and the infinite number of possible universes, somewhere, out there, I will ___always___ be with you.”

With that, Asher cleared his throat and stood, leaving her speechless. He tugged on his suede robes, smoothing them down in front of the mirror, then looking back to her.

After a moment, Vesper laughed, her eyes heavy with sleep.

“And in one of them, perhaps I would have realized what a sentimental old fool you were much sooner.” She huffed a bit at her own joke, then closed her eyes.

As she slept, she dreamt of the cosmos, sketched and inked into geometric figures, each one a proof for her lovers, each one beginning with the unchanging rule, “You are loved.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to those who have made it this far. This work started off as a short concept about Asher's tattoos between me and [@Yansurnummu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/yansurnummu/pseuds/yansurnummu), but quickly became so much more than that. It was started in the winter of 2019 and has sat in my drafts for over a year, in many ways because it feels a bit like saying goodbye to Asher.
> 
> It broke my heart when Bungie sunset him and so much of the content I came to love about the game. There's too much to be said about it to put here, but between that, and other experiences, my heart hasn't been in the right frame of mind to write for a long time. 
> 
> My Asher has always been a fiction, not just because he is an idealized version of someone else's character, but because he represented a hope I had for people like him in my own life. Despite his callousness, arrogance, and weaponized intelligence, my Asher was not afraid to be gentle or show affection. He knew how powerful a demonstration of feeling could be and how important trust was between those he cared about. He is deeply flawed, but he's self-aware, and, in the unlikely event he is wrong, he's willing to acquiesce and admit the other person was right. But he is a fiction, and if there's anything that 2020 taught me, it's that you can't be sustained by the narratives you write for other people. It is more important to be honest about how you feel and who you are than maintaining a fiction for the benefit of others. When you do, you will find more joy and happiness than you could imagine.


End file.
